This is a new series I’m beginning. We always hear that women are complicated and that we don’t even know how to understand them. Then there’s this famous picture that has been on social media for ages:
Seems like it has become universally accepted that it’s hard for men to understand women most of the time. Today we’ll talk about a very small portion of this huge concept. We’ll talk about compliments.
Do women love compliments?
While it is wrong to measure all women with the same yard stick, we’re going to make some generalizations.
The simple answer is YES. Women love compliments, but there are lots and lots of buts. In fact there are situations where complimenting a woman will send you to the fan zone. (This is beyond friend zone).
We limit the idea of compliments to outward appearance
It’s time we begun to think of complimenting other qualities of women besides their physical appearance. We mostly focus on telling women how pretty they look, how awesome their bodies look. They may love this, but that’s not all the compliments there is in this world. Compliment their intellectual prowess, compliment their achievements, compliment their attitude. Know when to compliment on what.
Who to compliment, what to compliment, when to compliment
Let’s take a look at some categories of women and under which circumstances complimenting them is a great idea.
The “I am beautiful and I know it” kinda woman
This woman is pretty, she’s been told so many times it probably means so little to her now. When you meet her and go like: wow you’re so beautiful! she’ll say thanks, and go her way, on a bad day she may even ignore you because she’s heard it time and again.
Nevertheless, if you’re her boyfriend/husband, she’ll be expecting compliments from you. She keeps hearing it from so many guys but the one from her man means so much to her.
If you’re not her man, then compliment on something else. Try to compliment on something in particular that most guys will miss. Compliment on her new shoes casually. Compliment on how eloquent she is, on how intelligent she sounds. Be honest, don’t say something that’s so obvious you don’t mean it.
You may be tempted to tell her she’s so pretty. Do it sometimes, but only after you’re sure your words are beginning to take root in her mind. Or do it if you’re just another fan out there.
The “I am pretty but my brain is prettier” kinda woman
This woman is intelligent but her beauty overshadows her intelligence. She’ll quickly brush off any attempt to compliment her beauty. She’s just like the previous type of woman but she’s more strict with the way she deals with compliments about her looks.
You know what to do, tell her how much you see beyond her looks.
The “Am I pretty?” kinda woman
She’s pretty. Maybe not as pretty as the first two types (Pretty per the media’s standard. I’m not judging any woman.) but she is pretty. In fact, she may be prettier than some other ladies who think they’re so gorgeous but in her mind, she doesn’t see herself too pretty. She loves to be complimented. Each time she’s complimented, she feels validated. She likes the comments from social media and may even thrive on them.
Just compliment her every time you have the chance. Be honest because she’s so critical about her looks she knows when you’re lying.
The Tom Boy
She’s all about strength, influence and all the things that a guy would love to display. Don’t compliment her on her feminine attributes. It just won’t work, period. Compliment her independence, work rate, anything that makes her feel manly and she’ll appreciate it.
There’s more, and it’s complicated
There are more types, some women are a mixture of some of these types. Don’t go about categorizing all women into the categories above.
We can go on and on about the numerous types of women but this is just one post. 🙂 Let’s not talk too much.
When you’re truly just a friend (or a brother)
When you’re truly a friend, and that’s all you want to be, then just ignore everything you’ve read. You can be ignored by her and you would probably not realize it because you were not looking in that direction.
One line to keep
If all this is too much to keep, just keep this. Make your compliments meaningful. Make your compliments dear, expensive and be sincere about it.